Feeling some fear about the future? If so, you’re in good
company. I’m right there with you. I look at the news and I
think, “Oh s%#t, where’s this all going? How is this going to
affect my business? How is this going to affect my career?” And
I know I’m not alone in that experience.
Believe it or not, fear can be your friend. Fear, like pain, is there
to alert you to the fact that something is potentially out-of-
whack. It tells you, “Hey, pay attention here!” That warning
signal can be a key component of a thriving life.
The trouble is that we often let it take control. And when we do,
it chokes off the energy flow and leaves us operating in a
constricted, low-flow world.
Here are five steps to help you put that fear to work FOR you,
rather than against you.
I. Listen to the fear
II. Deconstruct the fear
III. Get reasonable
IV. Identify steps
V. Take action
I. Listen to the fear
Your fear may very well have a valuable message. But if your
response to it is, “Lalalalala! I’m not listening to you,” you’re
likely to miss it entirely. Instead of trying to push it down and
pretend it doesn’t exist, give your fear a voice.
Sit down with your journal and ask, “What am I afraid of?” Get it
out of your brain and down onto paper. Write until there’s no
more energy behind it. Include both the reasonable and the
irrational fears. Get it all out in front of you so you can start
sifting through and making sense of what’s there.
II. Deconstruct the fear
Once you have identified the source of the fear, ask yourself,
“Can that be broken into smaller fears?” For example, if you’re
afraid that you’re going to lose your job, you might look at that
and realize that there are more fears attached to that. For
example:
- I might not be able to find another job.
- I won’t be able to keep up payments on my house.
- I will be a failure.
- I’ll never achieve my dreams.
- People will lose respect for me.
Once you have broken the fear into its component fears, you
can move on to the next step…
III. Get reasonable
Some fears are reasonable. Others aren’t. If you want to put
your fear to work for you, it’s important to separate those out.
From the list above, for example, it might be completely
reasonable to be concerned about the speed with which you
could find another job.
On the other hand, fears like, “I will be a failure,” or, “I’ll never
achieve my dreams” are nothing but hyperbole. They take an
immediate situation and expand it to fill the future. When you
encounter these, bring yourself back to the present.
IV. Identify steps
Once you have identified which fears are reasonable and
relevant, you can identify what steps to take in response to
each of those fears. For example, if you’re worried about your
ability to find another job, you might ask, “What would make it
easier to find another job? What do I need to know? Who do I
need to know? What steps can I take right now before I need
it?”
V. Take action
This is where you translate your fear-induced insight into
positive action. Taking steps to alleviate that fear has an impact
in multiple ways.
- It takes you out of victim mode and puts you in control.
- It makes you an active participant in your life.
- It creates a positive outcome from your fear.
- It eliminates the logjam and energy drain from unchecked fear.
Fear might not be pleasant, but it can be useful. If you
consistently apply these five steps any time you feel it creeping
up, you can make fear your friend.
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